Thank you, Thank you

Thanksgiving has come to be one of my most favorite days of the whole year. It all begins the night before when my girlfriends and I have a potluck of sorts at my friend Amy's house. This became a tradition sometime in college and I hope it lasts well into our old age. Thanksgiving Day means: early morning family run/hike (take a guess who is running and who is hiking), amazing food- my dad's stuffing, Merilee's pies from Brian's favorite recipes, any veggie concoction that Beist whips up, the steady flow of family and friends who come to visit for various parts of the meal, and the official beginning of Christmas music (although this year I cheated and started listening on election day because I was in such a good mood). It is a day when I feel like I take a deep breath and know for sure how much I do indeed have to be grateful for. I'm a big gratitude list person. I try to do one every day, if not on paper than at least mentally cataloging throughout the day. It makes me appreciate everything, it keeps me humble, and it reminds me to never waste one second in telling someone I love how much I love them.
In honor of Thanksgiving this year, I thought I'd share a random sample of entries I have in my journal over the past year.

Feb 21:
Merilee- for taking me to LA and navigating the city and helping me find a place to live. she is so endlessly good to me and it is such a gift

March 2:
home- it is a mirror, a microscope and a chance for rediscovery. these past 2 months have given me so much and allowed for some real soul searching and healing. i finally feel like an adult, not a kid desperately clinging to memories of normalcy and safety. the past is the past; it is in me- woven tightly and deeply and throughout but it doesn't have to define every move anymore. i am me today, with all of my faults but also all of my triumphs.

my family: everything that is good about me comes from them

March 13:
a pool at my new apartment in LA! it's like a mini-vacation!

March 21:
my brother Beist- it's his birthday today! 23, shack- I swear I just was. He is the twin to my heart and I love him for his sweetness, his humor and candor and his authenticity. He is one of the best people I know.

May 15:
my vaccuum cleaner- it changes everything

May 20
my teachers at MI- for their great advice and inspiration. Jamie told me today to 'sing every word like it is a book, don't let it all be about your voice, let it be about the story. connect with your audience and deliver the story'. and then of course there is Masta, who brought me to tears when he said 'i can tell you want to do something meaningful with your life, so don't get disheartened, just be ready. trust that people will want to hear you' i am so thankful for this encouragement. i am so thankful that is about becoming a BETTER me, not a whole new person. everyday i am humbled and excited and up to the task.

May 22:
the songs that come easy- you just say what you feel and it turns out, that's enough

June 2:
guitar- it is the most unexpected surprise of magic! i love it. it has both liberated me and captivated me in ways i never dreamed.

July 10:
stimulus checks
good coffee in the morning

August 7:
sarie- she is still someone I most want to be like

August 15:
playing with a band!!! it still cracks me up a little bit when i look around and i'm actually playing IN a band, but it's kind of the best feeling ever

August 19:
Lauralee: to have such a close friend is beyond my understanding
end of summer: it's syrupy sweet, lazy and hot, and welcomes the fall with those oranges and yellows and reds. great sunsets and cooler nights. fall is the best.

Sept 10:
my songwriting class- they are all SO talented and unique and humble and amazing

Sept 16:
Allie- finally got to talk to her for a long time last night and she is so amazing. she is such a good mom and such a good friend, so warm and charming and funny. i just love her to death.

Sept 20:
Heather and Joanne- got to have dinner and go out with them last night and I felt so lucky to have such close, dear friends
yummy candles- that smell like fall

Sept 24:
everything about making this record: the amazing people who are playing on it, Jenny's amazing support and understanding and hospitality, the time and genius and effort of everyone involved. i am so humbled.

Oct 15:
Obama!!!- so excited and so hopeful
my brothers and sisters- the coolest freakin people I know

November 18:
my dad: for being proud of me even when I feel like a failure

November 19:
Emi- called and read me the entire update section of the Nexus, our highschool alumni magazine. it was pretty hysterical to recount all of our shannigans while hearing about what everyone else is up to. everytime i think about her, i can't help but smile. she is nothing but good for the soul.

November 23:
Bernidet asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. I am so thankful for everything that our friendship has taught me and I am so honored, so touched, so excited to be a part of this with her.

The items go on and on. Tonight on my couch in my jammies after re-reading all these lists, I almost have to just laugh at how lucky I am. There are so many wonderful people in my life, so many opportunities I don't deserve. I promise to never take any of it for granted.
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone, and thank you, thank you to everyone I know and love for being in my life, for making me who I am.